Saturday, February 28, 2009

Emotional Hobo

Relationships are a conundrum to me. My affections have recently been sparked, my imagination whirling in possibilities only to be reeled back to the ground forcibly by my reason tinged with my perception of reality. Relationships challenge us all. Our species yearns for deep connection with the other. Some can satisfy that craving by serving their Lord, or Truth, dedicating their lives and their passions toward the greater good of all sentient beings. When I've practiced this in short periods of experiment I find myself swimming in a steady stream of contentment. I notice my emotional life no longer undulates from extreme peaks of joy down to dark sloughs of despair. I become an emotional hobo, riding down a middle rail. But this takes great discipline for me. The hobo life is a lonely one. The dynamic waters of this physical existence are in themselves a strong lure. Just as in sea kayaking I feel myself called to this challenge, to be able to navigate the winds, tides and waves of relationship and not lose my bearing. So far in this life I have failed to get beyond the breakers without disorientation. But if love calls I will answer, donning my personal flotation device and relaxing into the rolls. Whether I paddle into the sunset of my Truth alone or not, I vow to enjoy this ride we call life.

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